We tend to think that inviting people to church is the solution, and what’s worse we end up spending most of our time inviting people from other churches to our church so our church will grow. Think about it. It is much easier to invite a Christian to your church than a non-Christian. It is also easier to invite a non-Christian than to lead them to Christ yourself. This is the way the church acts as if it is growing when it is really full of cancer and is wasting away … at least in America.

Now what does this have to do with sex? Well think about this. If we make sex the goal, then lots of weird things happen. A single person starts chasing people to have sex with. Awkward dates lead to sex sure, but there is the anxieties leading up to, during, and after. Does this person like me? Are they willing to sleep with me? What do they think of the way I look naked? Are they enjoying this? They aren’t really saying anything. It all leads up to “so was it good for you?” Now this might be slightly alleviated in a marriage relationship, but even then these issues show up if sex is the goal.

Now compare this to inviting people to church. We try to look around and listen for someone to invite. Then we start sweating and nervously invite them. If they say yes we are almost shocked at we spit out the time and place. That morning we dress better and show up early when we are always late. Then we wait and think, “they aren’t coming.” When they finally show up we worry through the service. We watch them and try to figure out if they are having a good time. We try to help them avoid the sweaty hugger during the meet and greet. Are they bored? Did they get the joke? Is the worship to weird? Is the pastor performing? After it is all said and done, “so was it good for you?” Ok we might say, “so what did you think,” but I figure it is about the same.

So how do we fix this? Well with sex, if we focus on the relationship and build a strong healthy marriage then sex becomes a frigintastic benefit. It is great and something that can really draw a couple even closer. I think church is the same. What if we stopped thinking of church as the solution? What if we stopped inviting people to church? What if we started building relationships with people and helping them find Christ? Then Church becomes this amazing benefit to being a Christian. The community of faith will strengthen our walk as a Christian.

Ok, so here is the shirt,

This blog was written for the Blog Carnival at BridgetChumbly.com

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So this is the 4^th installment of how to dress like a Youth pastor. I will be talking about accessories, but be warned that I really don’t accessorize, so expect just a bit more sarcasm than previous posts.

Belts:

The first line of accessories are belts. If your pants slip and fall then buy a belt. You may be tempted to go with suspenders but trust me, those won’t score nearly as many cool points as you might be thinking. Unless you live in Texas the super huge belt buckle won’t either. Personally I own 2 belts. One is for work, as in labor, and the other is for all other occasions. I’d like to buy more belts because they have lots of cool choices right now. I just keep spending my belt money on silly things like feeding my family. Sorry.

Carry bags (aka the man purse):

If you are carrying a purse then you might want to consider a career in music. Seriously. Now if it is a laptop bag then you are doing much better. The trick is to keep only laptops and office type equipment in this bag. The second you start keeping your wallet, keys, and other pocket type items in the bag you have escalated to a man purse.

Cell Phone:

Cell phones are rated based on the total number of features with ease of texting being the single biggest feature. If you have a phone with a sliding or flip out qwerty keyboard your youth will think you are cool and the adults will think you are important. That is all you really need to know. Of course if the phone is larger than your hand and isn’t a smart phone like the iPhone, then it is time to trade up, even if it has a full-sized keyboard attached. Of course, my phone is a flip phone because I love to pretend I’m on Star Trek. I’m a geek though so it’s ok. The only other thing to remember when it comes to your phone is that you can’t use the stock ringtones and graphics. Find something that is uniquely you but not overly preachy. You students will walk away the first time they see you in Wal-Mart and hear “Amazing Grace” playing from your hip.

(edit from original)

I have since upgraded to a BlackBerry. I did it because I needed my brain for other useful information. Life has become much better since. The youth love it.

Other accessories:

I really want one of those leather wrist straps (sounds more manly than bracelet), but I’m not sure I can pull off the look. It is very important that you can look cool when wearing cool accessories otherwise you look like a dork that is trying to pull of the cool look. Imagine Steve Urkel trying to dress up like Eddie and you’ll have some idea of what you actually look like. This applies to all articles of clothing but accessories amplify this truth.

Here’s hoping I’ll be able to pull off the leather wrist strap look before they aren’t cool. I’m starting with leather strap watches and just going with wider and wider straps until I ditch the watch face all together. Tomorrow I’ll be wrapping this up with head wear.

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