My Experience As...

A Husband, Father, Youth Pastor, Geek, and Jesus Freak

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Archives for 2009

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Vacation Defined

Yeah I had a 2 week trip but definitely not a vacation. I think the problem is a difference in how that word is defined. My MIL, who I talked about extensively yesterday, seems to think that doing things other than work is the same as a vacation. I tend to think of a vacation as something that should be both fun and relaxing. I'm not opposed to doing things, but I like to enjoy what I'm doing, not just mark off a list of things that I have done.Let me give a couple of examples. I wanted to visit the redwood national forest. Turns out there are more than one and more than one kind of giant … [Read more...]

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My very unvacation

Have a very merry un-vacation …Ok or something like that. Actually there were a lot of good things about my vacation but it was more than a little stressful. I want to share a lot of the good things including pictures, but I don't want to really mix the good with the bad so I'm gonna pull all that out right here right now.Let me just say that 2 weeks was neither long enough and way too long. It wasn't long enough because there are things I wanted to do that we didn't have time for and it was way too long because of all the stuff we did do. My mother-in-law (MIL) is the root of most of the … [Read more...]

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Vacation Update: Living in the 90s

Just a really quick note here. I'm in the middle of nowhere Northern CA. I have no cell phone signal and would have to travel at least half an hour to get one. My only access to the digital world is through a dialup connection. OK sure it may not be third world but compared to my normal near cybernetic existence it is as if I have lsot one of my senses.Not one of the important ones like sight, hearing, or touch. No one of the elsser senses like taste and smell. Sure it is handy to be able to taste and smell but people that ahve lost those can carry on as if they have no handicap … [Read more...]

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Xtreme Glow in the dark Canon.

Hey, you know what I hate? The word Xtreme. Yeah I’m so sick of that word. The name of the Youth group used that word and I made it a point to change that but people around here don’t seem able to comprehend change. Xtreme was cool in the 90s but nearly 2 decades later it is the opposite of cool (not hot the other opposite). Groovy Youth would be a better name. Sure it is further out of date but that’s the point. Either it would be a new ironic name that would be cool and trendy or the group would have been so die hard to hold onto it for longer than I’m alive and so it would have real … [Read more...]

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Super Youth Pastor and the Church Split Engine

Our frigintastical fanatic of freedoms is confronted with an engine of doom. The Bored of Elders has activate the church split machine because SYP was able to resist their mind numbing boredom. The ground was shaking under SYPs feet and the drywall was already cracking. He stumbled into the sanctuary are saw a large crack forming at the back of the church and crawling to the front. The church was literally splitting in half. SYP rushed back into the bored room and grabbed the Elder Grump. "What have you done?" He cried above the roar. "What have I done? It is what you have done. … [Read more...]

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Chronicles of Narthan: A Tale of the Untainted Sons of God

Chapter 1: A god Among MenIt was an amazing day to be at the beach. The sun began to break over the houses behind the water causing the inky black waves to blaze with all the colors of the rainbow. Already there were surfers in the water waiting for the first big sets of the morning. Soon the beach would be too crowded for them as the sun quickly raised the temperatures from the brisk 67 degrees is was to the 91 degree forecasted temp. This was the day of appointment, but Alex didn't know it. He sat on his board watching the sun rise and counting the seconds till he would catch one of the … [Read more...]

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Bad Drugs, Good Ribs, and a Little Silk

I mentioned briefly yesterday about having my wisdom teeth pulled. This event fixed a major problem I was having with my sinuses, but it is also a wild story. I have some really crazy stories about growing up. I imagine most people could make their childhood strange and funny but I only need to tell what actually happened and people think I'm making it all up. Actually it is funny because I can tell the truth and people don't believe me but if I lie they swallow it hook line and sinker. Weird huh? This story isn't quite as outlandish as some of the others, but it is true to the best of … [Read more...]

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Is it safe?

So I'm gonna take a break from talking about sex. I do have a few important things to take care of today like my Wednesday night wrap up and all. Before that though, I gotta talk about my teeth and sinuses. Don't tell Candy but I haven't been to the dentist for over 10 years now. Well that was until yesterday. I've been having really bad sinus problems since November 2008. Last time I had problems like this it turned out it was dental.Back in high school I had braces. During my junior year I was sick a lot with sinus infections and strep through. I would basically get sick a few days … [Read more...]

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Hey look another red warning post

OK, so today I have a guest post over at Katdish.net. I'm guessing most people knew that and are coming from there, the problem is that I have a couple of shocking and potentially offensive posts in a row. This is not exactly typical but I have to admit I seem to walk into this a lot. Every time I talk sex with my Youth we seem to have a bunch of visitors even though I don't announce it ahead. Things just happen that way. If you would like to see what I would consider to be one of my better posts that isn't even remotely sex related instead of reading what I have today or yesterday that … [Read more...]

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If I believed in karma…

Today I posted a snarky comment asking "how do you define 'is?" This, of course, was a reference to Bill Clinton's slippery dodge of his claims to not having sexual relations with that woman. So far as I know this is the most well known instance of trying to define what sex is. Of course you know that my attempt at humor would backfire today when a teen asked me a very specific question about sex.*Warning*The following contains specific and frank discussion of sex and sexual acts. If this will offend you do not read further. When I talk sex with my teens I don't mince words so don't expect … [Read more...]

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